Tag, You're It!

One of my awesome Blogger friends, Anita Grace Howard, has tagged me in a rather odd but hilarious meme. So without further ado, here are my answers:

Are you a rutabaga?
No. Why, do you know something you're not telling me?

When was the last time you ate lion meat?
I wouldn't dare mess with the king of the jungle.

Upload a heartwarming picture of something that makes you smile.

Hubs and I on our honeymoon in St. Lucia - the best vacation ever!! This pic definitely makes me smile because it's goofy and brings back awesome memories. We had a romantic dinner on the beach and while we were waiting for our food, we got a little silly. (Don't worry, Hubs gave me permission to post this pic.) Side note - I won second place in a beer drinking competition AND ate fire during this trip. Plus we learned how to scuba dive. Like I said, BEST VACATION EVER!!

If you could go back in time and kick the crap out of someone, who would it be?
That *BLEEPING* *BLEEP* who stole my laundry out of the dryer at our old apartment complex two years ago. The person stole my favorite pajama pants, my favorite T-shirt, my bathing suit, my UNDERWEAR. I felt so violated. If I could go back in time and catch that person in the act, I would open up such a can of whoop-ass!

Name one habit that makes other people plot your demise.
Talking too quietly. I'M SORRY. I'LL USE MY MAN VOICE NEXT TIME.

What song would you like to be playing while you are kicking the crap out of someone?
How about "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister? Or maybe "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns 'n' Roses. Or anything by AC/DC. Just need an awesome rock song. (It's ridiculous how much time I spent looking up songs on YouTube, ha ha.)

Where da muffin top at?
Hanging over my waistband. Thanks for pointing that out.

How many goats, stacked atop one another like Yertle's Turtles, would it take to reach the moon?
Ummmmm, 100,000? I'm not good at distances. Are we talking tail to nose, or are the goats standing on each other's backs? The bottom ones would get squished - are we taking into account the inevitable squish factor?

Describe yourself using obscure Latin words.
Proin non velit nec potuisse (wishes she could do magic). Yes, I used Google Translate. Someone really should come up with a way to do magic. This is the closest I could get: magic wand remote control.

Why does evil exist?
Because Voldemort and Darth Vader make it look so cool. Though if I was evil, I wouldn't go for the snake look.

  

What the chiz are you thinking right now?
Someone should make a spoof video of Voldemort teaming up with Darth Vader. Or maybe doing a walk off, Zoolander style. Then, I thought about this Tumblr post by Tahereh Mafi and snickered.

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There you have it! Now, the rules say I can tag as many or few blog buddies as I want. Here are my picks:

1. Taryn Tyler
2. L.T. Host
3. Adam Heine
4. K.M. Criddle

Pick a funny nickname for number 1.
Oh gosh, I'm not good at nicknames. I'll go with "Queen of Old School Fantasy" because she rocks at it.

Make up a rhyme about number 2.
Horses, bunnies and cats,
I never see L.T. wear hats,
She's creative and sweet,
Doesn't like people touching her feet,
She's my bestest pal, and that's that!

Where would number 3 hide in the event of the apocalypse?
Inside a perfectly structured outline, safe from harm.

Where does number 4 purchase her pants?
If we're talking about those comfy crop pants, I think she got them at Target. I gotta get me some of those!

If I tagged you, feel free to play along! Or not. Up to you :). Have a great week.